The smell of pines and rain

Rain clouds brewing over the edge of downtown Raleigh.

This morning I was meditating on my back deck when I realized the greatest peace was coming to me through smell. The air here is thick plant aromas and humidity. I tried to identify particular smells, and the two I could were pine and rain. Mixed in were several other scents, including a valerian-like perfume whose plant I’ve never been able to identify (it’s not actually valerian).

I felt all the other moments I’ve smelled that combination of scents and I expanded into my own memories, my self through time. I felt bigger than just un-showered me in my bathrobe at 7:45am today. I felt like I contained variety and wisdom. It was a good feeling.

It helped me handle the things that are on my mind this week: a conflict with a friend, the ways I sometimes lie to myself to protect my own self-image, the pulled funding of the Department of Education.

I was able to see myself as a being across time and space, all because of the smells I was breathing in. That is magic.

To my mind, magic and science are one and the same - empirical science encompasses the magic we’ve been able to reliably replicate and measure. There is a lot of magic / science that doesn’t qualify yet. For example, I’ve lately started talking openly to my cat about what she could do that would be helpful. I don’t talk down to her - I talk to her the way I’d want her to hear me if she could really understand me. With respect and care and honesty.

And as I do that, I start to believe she really can understand me. It’s not just because she responds to what I ask (“I need to brush your right side more, you always present your left side and I want to get them both,” I tell her, and the next time I brush her she presents her right side immediately; “When you scream at me to play with you, it’s jarring, and then I’m not in the mood to play,” I tell her, and the next time, she meows politely to ask). It’s also because I feel a shift between us: she looks at me more directly and seeks my eye contact more often. She is more attentive and cuddly. We are beginning to share a greater understanding of each other.

I am not likely to become a scientist, but I intend to be a regular experimenter with the magic I encounter.

Cordelia in my office window sitting behind my childhood teddybear and blanket.

Village Witch’s Corner

My intention this week : 

Connect with my spirit guides.

Question(s) I'm asking this week:

What is the guidance I receive from outside myself?

What I’m reading:

I’ve reverted to reading romance novels before bed, which are the best way for me to get myself into a space for sleep. I’m currently enjoying Never Judge a Lady By Her Cover by Sarah MacLean.

Tiny Spell of the Week:

Share something I’m uncomfortable sharing when I’m in conversation with others. See if I can expand my capacity for vulnerability. (It’s kind of a big spell.)